I Put Up a Profile on eHarmony…. Now What?

I haven’t posted a pic so I haven’t committed to the process fully- and from what I’ve been told, it is a process- much like looking for a job.

Fun.

So what do I do?

I ask friends who have either been on eHarmony or have done the internet dating thing.

One was on eHarmony six months and found it frustrating. I might squeeze her for more details on this later. The other friend was practically giddy that I was doing this and truly believes I will find the “love of my life”…. I am not saying no but I figure why not?

Really, I posted the profile on a whim. What I didn’t expect to see were six matches right away.

Gah! Too soon.

I had a quick look at the profiles and they were all older than me- some significantly. Wasn’t expecting that- silly, naïve me.

I checked this morning- two nudged me for a photo and one wants to chat.

I panicked.

And I feel slightly nauseous.

I was finally starting to feel normal-ish from the break-up and then the crush and now I feel sick again.

Great.

The giddier of my friends demanded an audience. There were rules she wanted to lay down to smooth my way. She understands I am not an idiot but the newbie that I am could use the guidance so I got pen and paper and prepared to take copious notes.

  1. NEVER (never, never, never, never) meet anyone on a first date unless it is at a public venue. (Common sense, like I would ever- call me safety girl.)
  2. NEVER (never, never, never, never) take anything at face value (i.e. question the profiles)
    1. People tend to put what they think be the most attractive (In other words, bait.)
    2. Height and weight is often exaggerated (I’m short so I figure that will be a plus for me.)
    3. Divorced- don’t take it for granted, he may have filed, he may just go back to the Mrs. Separated- they may still be living together (Wha????)
    4. People lie about everything (See 2 a-c), age (??!!), appearance (using other people’s pictures or ones from 20 years ago)….(Seriously, why bother??)
    5. People who like to keep secrets and have tons of baggage like to hang out here. (Excellent.)
    6. Never divulge specific identifying details until you meet, maybe. (Check.)

All common sense but the naïve part of me doesn’t get why you would even bother if you are not going to be honest about who you are and what you are about. This is a total time sucker to begin with but to deliberately fudge and sugar coat the details?

Seriously, what is the point? I understand keeping a certain level of privacy so the crazies can’t find you but if you completely misrepresent yourself, you are not going to find anyone.

So now, I edge closer to signing up, for a month at least, to test the waters. $25 is not going to break the bank.

My friend has called with additional advice and cautions. Stay tuned.

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~ by angryegg on August 12, 2010.

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