Family- Can’t Live With Them….

Can’t kill them.

Can’t wring their neck.

Oh, my sister just got into town.

Can you tell?

She arrived last week and there was instant acrimony.

Some things never change.

It fascinates me how quickly people fall back into the same familial roles and patterns of behaviour- regardless of age and circumstances.

And I am not just talking about my family. This kind of thing seems to happen with everyone- further proof of my belief that who we are is pretty much set by the time we start school and it takes something devastating and monumental to change.

Sure, I am the first to admit that this is my perspective, my viewpoint. If you don’t agree, you can write your own blog.

We had a sister between us but she died a long time ago. We were only 11 months apart so we were very close. Sister-recently-back-from-far-off-lands is two years and almost three months younger than me so she probably felt left out so she naturally turned to mom and dad and outside the family for attention.

I just survived came back from a week in my hometown with just my mom and my sister for the most part. We are still sorting, packing, and cleaning but we had the added stress of getting things together for a garage sale. That was a load of fun.

Stress piled upon stress coupled with the lack of sleep is a recipe for disaster. Surprisingly, my sister and I only got into two shouting matches heated debates.

I freely acknowledge my shortcomings but does it happen the other way? Please, I don’t see pigs flying yet.

One may see this as a sign of weakness but believe me, any flaw in an argument…. I also have no qualms about returning the favour in a later discussion if you continue to belabor a point or attempt to call me out on a perceived inconsistency.

Does anything ever really get resolved? No but we came the closest to it yesterday when she acquiesced and provided me the details of something that should have been disclosed from the onset. Of course it also helped that she made my argument for me.

Check and mate.

Apparently communication only happens one way. I know knowledge is power but when did this become a bargaining chip when we are all after the same thing- looking after our mother?

I am all for full disclosure in the affairs of our father’s estate (of which I am co-executor with my mom- something that also caused tension between us even though we all found this out together when mom dug up dad’s will) and in any dealings I have related to my mom. God forbid if I tried to conceal or inadvertantly forgot to reveal a detail that she deemed important. The phrase “holier than thou” doesn’t even come close to the ire that would be thrown my way.

Regardless, I see it as a small victory- even though I am sure history has already been re-written in her mind- as we are all wont to do.

Our selective memories aside, I have concrete evidence of gross arrogance that I will pull out when the need arises. That I still find it as amusing as it is unbelievable just adds to the impact it will have if she pushes me far enough.

Until then, it will be my Ace to reveal to seal an argument discussion that will happen.

It is only a question of when.

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~ by angryegg on May 31, 2010.

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