V Day

Why are people so obsessed with Valentines Day?

Scores of people asked what I was doing for Valentines- not if I was doing anything.

My response? A sputter of disgust and a look of mild disdain followed by “Nothing.”

I have been trying to make plans with a friend to go for dim sum. Trying to make arrangements with her is like trying to fit in a play date with an overscheduled child. We kept pushing it from one weekend to the next and I suggested this weekend. The first thing she asked was if it was going to interfere with V Day.

My response? See above followed by “No.”

As it turns out, this was a bad weekend because Family Day is Monday and I was (am) going to be in Port Elgin visiting my parents. So, for V Day, I am not even with my boyfriend. He did call yesterday but more to say “Hi,” than for the day itself but we did say “Happy V Day” and laughed

I’m lucky that he doesn’t buy into the whole thing- I would probably feel obligated to do the same. He has been told that if he ever tries to propose on V Day I would probably cry and then kick his ass for buying into that cheese.

I’ve never bought into the day as an opportunity to show someone you love that you care. You shouldn’t need a day to show a loved one how you feel.

A friend shared a theory. His thinking is that this is more of a holiday for the young and perhaps slightly less secure. He could have called me old, crotchety and jaded- I wouldn’t have been offended but I don’t really agree (with the idea, not the assessment of my personality.) Some very good friends of mine (around my age) get somewhat weepy at the thought of being single on Feb. 14th while I have never reveled in the day- even in my more naïve youth. (That I was never a “dater” might have had something to do with it too.)

I remember how Valentines cards were exchanged in grade school and how carnations could be ordered up for delivery first period in high school as a fundraiser. I always found this to be more of a gauge of one’s popularity than anything else.  Those of us who barely registered on the social radar were lucky to get one or two (sometimes nothing) while the popular kids would be walking around with bouquets. Some people cared more than others- I just wasn’t willing to play the kind of reindeer games to endear myself to be counted amongst the ranks of a particular crowd.

Am I cynical, bitter and resentful? I like to think that I try not to let those things that are out of my control drive me crazy (politics and the injustices of the world aside). But do I think much of what happens to us in our youth stay with us forever? Of course it does. Most people never move beyond high school in a real way.

The bottom line is that V Day is just a marketing ploy- to extricate you from your hard earned cash (though I have seen many articles about how a Valentines Day at home  can be more romantic than a night on the town.) I guess if you need an “official” day to celebrate your love for someone, go for it- and not let crabby b!tches like me ruin your fun.

I like to think it is the little things that you do every day to show people you care that are the ones that really matter.  

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~ by angryegg on February 15, 2009.

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